A Series of Fortunate Events

I'm extremely lucky to be a Celebrant who conducts the full range of ceremonies, namely weddings, funerals and namings. 

I often conduct weddings for a family who know me through my funeral work, and vice-versa. It's an honour and a privilege to be in such a position, as you are someone that a family can turn to whenever you are needed.

All of these Humanist ceremonies are united by a common theme, in that they are centred on the people that the ceremony is about.

An important part of a Humanist wedding is the story of how a couple met; not only does it make the ceremony unique, as the couple are unique, it's often very funny and serves to unite the past and and the present.

This next story though isn't about a wedding I conducted; it's a story about how a couple met in a funeral I conducted for one of them. It's a great story that shows how much serendipity can play a part in our lives, and I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I know I'll enjoy telling it.

Let me firstly take you back in time, to a misty evening in March 1949 in the beautiful city of Prague. 

The famous Charles Bridge which dates back to 1357.

Historically, it was a period of great turbulence.

World War Two had not long ended and the scars it had left were still fresh. 

All over Europe, countries were starting to pick up the pieces again after six years of terrible warfare.

The Czech Republic, or Czechoslovakia as it was then part of, had fallen under Communist Rule in 1948 and the Iron Curtain was being drawn across Eastern Europe. 

This new border, between East and West, meant former allies in the fight against the Nazis now viewed each other with suspicion and distrust. 

The Czech people were to have a very uneasy relationship with the Soviet leadership in Moscow, culminating in the brutal suppression of a period of attempted political reform in the country, known as the "Prague Spring". If you want to know more about this, then this Wikipedia article is a good place to start:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prague_Spring

I won't say anymore about this here, except that if it hadn't occurred, the people involved wouldn't have had cause to move to Scotland, and I would never have met them. More serendipity I guess, for me at least.

Our story begins properly with Vaclav (pronounced 'Vatslav'), a young man who was in Prague serving out his National Service with the Czech Air Force. The evening in question, he decided to head to one of the many cinemas in Wenceslas Square.

Wenceslas Square in the late 1940's. 

(Note: Those of you who have been to Prague in the last few decades might be surprised to hear that Wenceslas Square in the evening wasn't always a place where Stag Parties of drunken British men allow themselves to be lured into seedy establishments with the promise of cheap beer and "private dances", but then get charged £500 for a round of four beers and threatened with extreme violence by Czech gangsters if they don't pony up. Or so I've been told...)

That same evening also finds Carla, a young lady from Prague working late in her office. 

The only reason Carla was there was she had been asked out on a date, but she didn’t fancy him so she worked late deliberately to avoid him!

The phone went and it was someone asking for a colleague; during the conversation, Carla was told that she sounded nice, so one thing led to another and she was asked if she would like to go to the cinema in Wenceslas Square later that evening.

Carla was intrigued, but retained the presence of mind to ask "How will I recognise you?" 

"Look for me in a leather jacket” she was told.

She rushed home to get changed, but her mother was very sceptical and told Carla that she was being silly and that she shouldn't go out to meet a man when she didn't even know what he looked like.

However Carla was a very strong willed young lady and ignored her mother's advice.

When she got to the cinema though, her heart sank as she realised she had been setup to be the butt of someone's joke. Standing together in the foyer, were three men all wearing the same leather jackets! 

Carla thought, "I’m not having this" and didn’t let on she had arrived but at the same time she didn’t want to go home as she knew her mother would laugh at her, and that just wasn't going to happen.

She decided to head to another cinema and walked up to the ticket booth. Arriving at that booth at exactly the same time was our Vaclav.

There was bad news though; all of the tickets for the next film were were sold out. 

Watching this was an old man, who had bought two tickets, but his wife hadn't arrived and the film was about to start.

He said to Vaclav "I have tickets you can have, but I won't sell them to you unless you buy both of them, one for you and one for this young lady".

The man then gave Vaclav a bit of advice; “after the cinema, take this young lady for a coffee, and before the year is out, there will be a wedding”. 

Vaclav was to call this man “the magic man” because his prediction became true when Vaclav and Carla married only five months later. 

A newly married couple in Prague, 1949...

By the time Vaclav passed away, they had been together through thick and thin for over 65 years, a quite remarkable testament to the love, friendship and companionship that they shared.

I had the honour of conducting Vaclav's funeral and this story was told to me by Carla in person, with such incredible warmth, charm and humour that I've never forgotten it. It helped that I'd visited Prague a number of times so I could relate to what she was telling me. I also impressed her with my knowledge of her native language, in particular my flawless "Krusovice Cerny". 😀🍺

So 'Na zdravi' Carla, to you and your family who have made Scotland your home and who brought this and other wonderful stories with you to share.

Uvidíme se příště!

An Apache Blessing

I was given the inspiration for this next blog post when I was browsing through my picture archive. 

Up popped a pic of Edward and Marlien, along with all the others from that day, and it was nice to be taken back to pre-Covid times. 

To set the scene, this ceremony took place back in September 2019, at the Monachyle Mhor Hotel which is in a really lovely loch-side location in the wilds north of Callander. 

https://monachylemhor.net/ 

As is usual, I was contacted about conducting the ceremony long before the day itself. Right from the off, I knew it was going to be something a bit different when I was asked if I spoke any German.

Edward hailed from a Scottish / German background, and lived and worked in Germany, which is of course where he met the lovely Marlien.

We discussed how the ceremony would work, and while I can order beers in multiple languages,  I figured that wasn't going to cut it. However, the couple decided that one of their friends would read something in German for those guests who had travelled over. A few months later, we met up in Stirling when the couple were over visiting Edward's relatives and started the process of putting pen to paper. In order to cut down on the paperwork, they were going to get legally married in Germany, but otherwise the ceremony in Scotland was going to have all the trimmings!

So to the big day itself.

Once you come off the "main road" (after spending 20 mins in 4th gear tootling along behind a caravan of caravans, which makes me wonder what the plural is for multiple caravans in a row, but I digress), you've the got to negotiate a long single track road. The main thing to take from this is leave yourself plenty of time to get there. However the drive does take you through some amazing scenery.

Weather wise, it was shaping up to be a lovely day, and so it proved to be.

The driveway up to the hotel.

By the time I arrived, the party was already in full swing, and the guests were taking advantage of the great weather out on the terrace. Most of them had travelled over from Germany, and were not expecting to see Scotland in the sun!

A happy crowd of thirsty Germans. Is there a 'plural' for this?

I checked in with Edward when I arrived, and sadly had to refuse numerous offers of alcoholic drinks. Once we were told that Marlien was ready, we made our way down to the loch-side - it was almost a shame to drag everyone away from the terrace, but sacrifices had to be made.

To prevent our guests from wandering all over the Trossachs, someone had helpfully marked out the route:

On the right track.

Don't miss the turning...

The obligatory yawning chasm with roaring flood at the bottom.

Our destination, the banks of the beautiful Loch Voil.

Out of nowhere, a ceremony arch. David Copperfield eat your heart out.

The ceremony was just one of those magical moments. A location framed by the hills; all the guests seated by the loch-side; Edward and Marlien with the loch as their back-drop; the best Celebrant in Scotland performing an amazing ceremony and the sun not only providing some late autumn warmth, but highlighting the vivid green of the local plant life. It was just perfect, and I know that Marlien, Edward and all of their guests, wherever they hailed from, felt the same way.

In the end, there were two contributions from our German guests. One was a song called "Geh Aus Mein Herz und Suche Freud”, and the other was a heartfelt speech from Edward's dear friend and mentor, Herr Gregor Scholl. Gregor was very much part of the story of how the couple met and it was very fitting that he spoke on the day. 

The couple also incorporated an old Scottish tradition of "tying the knot", using materials from India, a country Marlien has a close affinity with.

Edward and Marlien "Das gluckliche paar" (according to Google translate).

"So what about the Apache Blessing?" I hear you ask. Did the couple incorporate this well-known reading, translated from a Native North American Wedding Ceremony? Well not quite...

An unexpected guest...

A British Army AH-64D aka... the Apache!

A very different kind of Apache blessing I'm sure you'll agree!

There was two of them buzzing around the glen, and I had to stop speaking a few times as I just couldn't compete. One of them even hung around to watch us for a bit. It occurred to me that these helicopters are fitted with highly advanced optics so no doubt if they were taking pictures, they would be very high quality. If I knew who to contact, I'd get in touch to see if they would send copies. So if anyone has an address, do let me know 😁

Call sign Charlie-Hotel-Alpha-One signing off!

Lord of the Aisles

A wedding on the beautiful Isle of Canna. 

There are many perks to being a Humanist Celebrant. One is the opportunity to work with lots of brilliant couples from all different backgrounds and be part of their big day. Another is being invited to conduct ceremonies in venues and areas of Scotland that I might otherwise overlook, or in this case, travel to an island that I might not otherwise think of going to.

I was contacted away back at the beginning of 2020 by Steve who was looking to get married to Maria somewhere in the Highlands. After some deliberation, mainly centred around hotel unavailability the couple settled on Canna.

My first thought was "sounds brilliant, I've never got round to visiting any of the Islands". I then remembered I'd been to Arran for a (fantastic) ceremony but otherwise I haven't even been to Millport. (In any case, given that you can see Arran from Ardrossan, while a great place to visit it arguably doesn't have the same mystique as say, the Hebrides.)

My second thought was "actually, before I agree to this, precisely where the #### is Canna?" so I went straight to google maps (I have a Huawei phone that predates the US Govt ban thank goodness, otherwise the app is called "Petal". No me neither.). Then to Caledonian MacBrayne ferries - other ferry operators are apparently available but good luck with that.

My third thought was "looks amazing, and didn't my ancestors (Vikings) rule that area? It'll be like coming home" - see the end of this post for more info.

Sadly, Steve and Maria then had to cancel due to Covid, but you can imagine my delight when they revisited their plans earlier this year when restrictions started easing.

After some discussion with Maria, we worked out the logistics for the ceremony. This is when I discovered that to travel out on the Wednesday ferry meant that I was there until Friday, as there was no ferries on the Thursday. However Maria was undaunted and said she would take care of all the accommodation on the island, so we were all set!

Eagle-eyed viewers who take the time to look at the Canna Ferry Timetable will spot that there is a ferry on the Monday. I wasn't able to take this due to having a wedding ceremony that day near Lochgilphead, which deserves a blog all of its own! 

Instead of "planes, trains and automobiles", this journey was more "cars, ferries and shanks' pony". 

After I had finished in Lochgilphead, it was off to Mallaig via Oban. The weather on the Monday and Tuesday was fab, so of course when I got on the Canna ferry on the Wednesday morning it was overcast and dull.

The ferry goes by the name of the MV Loch Nevis and it takes around two and a half hours to get to Canna. 

Your Celebrant looking windswept and interesting as he leaves Mallaig on the MV Loch Nevis.

It stops at Rum as well. I kept my eyes out for any Sea Eagles but it wasn't to be. 

Heading into Rum.

Arriving at Canna.

When you get off the ferry, you are met by the lovely Fiona who runs Tighard Guest House. If you fancy a stay there, here's the link:

https://www.tighard.scot/

Fiona basically runs the entire house herself, and one of her many talents is making breakfast, as you can see from the pic below.

A gratuitous full breakfast shot.

So, to the ceremony itself.

As previously mentioned, the weather had been great, right up till the day of the ceremony. Those of you who have ever planned a ceremony in Scotland will be familiar with this feeling. This is why we invented a) warm clothing b) indoors with heating and c) aeroplanes that can whisk us off to sunnier climes.

However, as a great man once said, there's no such thing as bad weather, there's just the wrong clothes. I would also argue that there's no place like Scotland in the mist, and there's no place like an island off the coast of Scotland in the mist. 

Silver sands.

As you can see, the beach on Canna that Steve and Maria chose for the ceremony looks amazing anyway.

Steve and Maria

Jumping the broom.

Steve hails from a Romany background, and one of their very old marriage traditions is to "jump the broom", which signifies the journey from single to married life.

Sprinkling alcohol.

Maria is from the Greek island of Rhodes, and she choose an ancient Greek tradition where alcohol is sprinkled on the marriage altar. As the island itself was our altar that day, she sprinkled some fine Talisker Whisky (which also happens to be the closest distillery), while reciting from the play Antigone.

Just, because...

After the ceremony, we headed back to the Cafe Canna (https://www.cafecanna.co.uk/) for a celebratory dinner. Despite the remote location, The Cafe Canna has a well deserved reputation for culinary excellence and many a passing yacht anchors in the bay while hungry sailors row ashore. Advance booking is highly recommended and you can even use your VHF radio (Channel 8 by the way) on your boat to make a booking. 

The Cafe Canna.

If the Cafe needs a delivery, the local fisherman just drops off his catch outside.

A seafood platter. Yes it tasted as good as it looks.

Unfortunately the weather on the Thursday took a turn for the worse, but that didn't stop us spending the day drinking heavily exploring the island. After a bracing walk in the wind and the rain, you're more than ready for your next visit to the Cafe Canna. I wanted to see the local Puffin colony, but it was just too far, so here's a pic of an Oystercatcher instead.

The island itself is just as you would expect, i.e. ruggedly awesomely beautiful. These next pics give you an idea, but they don't really do the place justice. 

The only thing missing was the Sea Eagles. There's a few on the island, but sadly they didn't put in an appearance.

It almost goes without saying, that on Friday morning the sun came out and the island was transformed.

The view from Tighard Guest House.

In the distance is the Isle of Rum, which had been hidden by clouds the entire time. It loomed out of the mist like a scene from "The Land that Time Forgot", but without the dinosaurs. 

Of course, all good things must come to an end and it was time to head back down to the jetty to get the ferry back to civilisation the mainland. The ever helpful Fiona offered to take our bags down in her car (one of the only vehicles allowed on the island) while we had a last stroll.

Farewell Canna.

So there you have it. A mini adventure, which included a trip up the West Coast, two ferry journeys, a successfully married couple and a world class seafood platter, and all without leaving Scotland. We really do have some amazing places practically on our doorstep and it's given me the notion to visit some more islands. Islay next I think, which segues nicely into this last part.

This post ends with a short family history lesson, or else the amazingly witty pun in the post title might sadly pass you by, and we don't want that. 

Or even worse, you might think it's something to do with a supermarket.

My surname McSorley is the anglicised form of the Gaelic Mac Somhairle, i.e. son of Somhairle or in English Somerled. More detailed info on Somerled can be found on wiki:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Somerled

That article shows that Somerled was effectively the first "Lord of the Isles" and as one of his descendants, I get to use this title that he fought so hard for in order to create brilliant puns for your amusement. 

On whether the great man himself was authorised to conduct legal weddings the annals are sadly silent.

Slainte!

When Destination Weddings Come to You

Scotland has always been a major tourist destination, in particular for our American cousins, many of whom have ancestral links to the country.

It's only natural then, that Scotland should be high on the list of destinations for couples from abroad who are looking to plan what we now call a "destination wedding".

Now one of the big things you need to have in mind when organising a destination wedding is that firstly, you are organising a wedding. The next thing you need to take into consideration is you are organising this wedding in a foreign country.

It's therefore not a choice for the faint-hearted, even taking into account our close links with the US, that include a shared language.

Enter stage right Lauren and Patrick!

I consider myself very much a "21st Century" Celebrant, so I find working with couples who are based abroad to be very simple; email, SKYPE (other video call software is available), even, dare I say it, a voice call. This works equally well for couples based in otherwise inaccessible wilderness regions of the UK, such as Fife 😂

Once I'd had a chat with the couple about how we go about putting the ceremony together, they were very keen to get started.

Fast forwarding to the big day itself, I turned up at Carlowrie Castle to find the largest collection of US Nationals on a mission in Scotland since Eisenhower was based at Culzean Castle!

Carlowrie proudly flying the Saltire during the invasion.

The place was buzzing, and although everyone claimed to have seen Patrick, it took me a while to track him down.

Even though they hadn't been to a Humanist ceremony before, Lauren and Patrick just "got it". The personal information that they included in the script was brilliant and made a lasting impression on their guests. Tears, laughter, romance, everything a Humanist ceremony should be about. One of the Bridesmaids in particular got quite emotional and declared it to be "the best ceremony I've ever been to!"

The couple wanted to include a Scottish tradition so drinking whisky from the quaich fitted the bill perfectly. Once Lauren and Patrick had taken a drink, the Best Man Jay (Patrick's bro) was introduced to another Scottish tradition - finishing off what was left, which he did in one go! Nice one Jay!

If there's no confetti, is it really a wedding? Discuss.

The Boys.

The Girls.

The Gang!

So thank you Lauren and Patrick for asking me to be your Celebrant!

I enjoyed meeting you, your friends and your families, and I wish you both nothing but the best for the future. And if you ever need a Celebrant again, well I've never been to the US. Just saying .... 😀

You were at your maw's wedding!

When I was growing up in the East End of Glasgow, a common riposte, or even non-sequitur (not that I knew what a non-sequitur was back then) when someone was annoying you, was "you were at your maw's wedding".

My friends and I were admittedly quite advanced in the art of insults when we were five!

That was some 30 years ago now. Well actually it's over 40 but let's move on.

Thankfully it's no longer an insult. In fact, it's quite the reverse. Smaller children often take part in their parents weddings as Flower-girls and Pageboys, and grown up children as Bridesmaids and Best Men. For older couples, it can be grandchildren performing these roles. It all goes towards reinforcing the feeling of the wedding being an occasion for family and friends to get together and have a good time, creating treasured memories that cross the generations.

Recently I conducted a wedding for Andrew and Sarah. When we met a couple of months ago to start putting the ceremony together, Andrew reminded me that I had conducted his dad Jim's wedding to Joanne back in 2012, and that Andrew was the Best Man that day. As part of Jim and Joanne's ceremony, they passed the rings around the guests, the idea being for each guest to wish the couple well, while holding the rings. One of Andrew's jobs was to keep an eye on the rings as they were passed around, and to ensure we didn't get a polo mint and a haribo ring back!

His dad Jim was going to return the favour, and act as Best Man to Andrew. On the day of the wedding, it made for a really nice sense of continuity. It's also great when you have a connection to other people at the ceremony.

The Best Man connection was not the only theme to the wedding. Sarah is quite indulgent of Andrew's enthusiasm for Batman as this picture shows...

The happy couple, Andrew and Sarah! Stay away from the mini-golf guys 😃
(Is it just me or does Sarah look a wee bit like the actress Alyson Hannigan, aka "Willow" in Buffy the Vampire Slayer? Just saying. It wasn't my favourite series or anything like that...)

And of course, the story would not be complete without the Best Man. It was great to see Jim and Joanne again and they look younger now than they did when I conducted their wedding!

See you all at the Naming <cough> 👍

Santorini Bitchez!

When Stephanie contacted me back in 2018 to ask me if I would conduct her wedding to Scott in May 2019, and that the only thing was, it was to be in Santorini, and would I be prepared to travel? I must admit to giving her request some deep thought.

Fifteen nanoseconds later, I said "Yes, of course, I'd love to!"

I first met Stephanie when I conducted her beloved dad Stephen's funeral back in May 2013. Amidst the tears, there were also a lot of laughs as he was some man.

I also conducted her gran and granda's funerals, and her cousin Charlene's wedding, so I'm pretty much the family Celebrant.

Stephanie is a fantastic organiser, so when she offered to take care of the logistics, I didn't say no.

I arrived at my hotel not long after midnight on the Thursday (technically Friday morning) and was shocked to discover there wasn't a pub open! What was a thirsty Celebrant to do? Catch up on Game of Thrones was the answer (wasn't Series 8 a complete downer?). 😀

The view along the beach from just outside the hotel next morning made up for the lack of beer the night before...

A lovely view I'm sure you'll agree.

Some might say this view is even better...

I had arranged to meet with Stephanie and Scott to do a recce of the venue called Le Ciel (http://www.leciel-santorini.com/) so we went up on the Friday afternoon.

The view from the venue is just stunning as this next pic shows:

Apparently you're looking into what used to be the centre of the island, until the 16th century BC, when a volcanic eruption devastated the place. Some say this gave rise to the legend of Atlantis, but I digress.

The only downside to the first day, is that the weather back in Scotland was also brilliant, thereby removing my ability to gloat. Can't have everything!

So onto the big day itself.

It got off to a good start with the coach up to the venue; everyone looked great, dressed up to the nines and in high spirits. No pictures though. What happens when a coachload of Glaswegians are getting bussed around Santorini, stays in Santorini. What I can say though, is that the front of the bus cannot sing. Allegedly ... 😂

A quick selfie before the ceremony. Also an excuse to stand in the shade. 

The next few pictures are of the ceremony itself, and I don't think any words are needed.

(Image by Phosart Photography Cinematography)

The ancient Scottish tradition of "tying the knot" using a piece of material that had been in the family for at least five minutes, because someone forgot to bring the actual materials out from the UK, and then the replacement materials from the local market. I'm not telling you who forgot them, because ah'm no a grass.

The beautiful violinist entertaining the guests after the ceremony. She was just in the way of the photo of the scenery, honest.

Mr and Mrs McAtear!

One of my favourite pictures of the entire trip.

My actual favourite picture of the entire trip.

 (I took this myself in case you're blown away by its brilliance. I also conduct ceremonies 😊)

Now, Santorini is famous for it's churches with the blue domes on top. Sadly, I was on the wrong part of the island for these, so this mini-church is the closest I got. Kind of cute though, no?

My chariot awaits at Santorini Airport.

The end.

p.s. A big shout-out to Stefania and her team at Ever After Events and Weddings (http://everafterdays.com/ & https://www.facebook.com/everafterdays/) who made sure the entire day ran flawlessly. If any of your clients ever express a preference for a Humanist Celebrant with a Scottish accent, a fantastic sense of humour and amazing photography skills, please pass my number on!